How to practice self-care and self-love. 20 ways to make your life better by you’re taking care of yourself.
You know what they say: practice makes perfect.
Learning how to practice self-care and self-love is just that: a practice.
Social media may leave you feeling that all you need to do is run a bath and throw a face mask on and you’re good to go. While self-care and self-love certainly can involve facials and hot soaks, there are so many other ways to be good to yourself beyond that! Your self-care and self-love practice will look different based on your needs and interests, and it will probably involve (at least at first) experimenting with different things to see what sticks.
In this article, you will learn about the importance of self-love and self-care. When looking after yourself, you’re doing a huge favour for those around you. You have the power to make your relationships with the people who matter most in your life better because you’re taking care of yourself. Here are 20 healthy ways to practice self-care and self-love:
1 Start a Journaling Practice
Writing can help you get to know yourself better and teach you how to love yourself. It also allows you to get your stressful thoughts and hard feelings out on the page and chart your growth over time. Writing can be a powerful tool in the pursuit of self-love. It allows us to see ourselves through our own eyes, without any external distractions. It helps us understand what we’re struggling with and where we need to grow.
2 Slow down
This is one of the most important things to do for yourself! When we rush around all day, it’s hard to remember that we are human beings with feelings and emotions, needs, and wants. Make sure you are taking care of yourself by making time to slow down throughout the day. Your mind and body will thank you later.
3 Spend time with loved ones
Being around people we love is another great way to take care of ourselves. It doesn’t mean that you should be spending all your time (or even any time) with just one person – be sure to spend time with family members, friends, lovers, etc. Let’s explore how to practice self-love in a relationship.
Spending time with people who love us makes us feel cared for, supported and loved. It also helps us get rid of negative emotions like loneliness and isolation, which are harmful to our physical health and mental well-being.
Being around people we love doesn’t just make us feel better; it can actually help improve our health by lowering blood pressure, reducing stress hormones and boosting the immune system — all things that are important for overall health and well-being.
4 Use mantras
Having positive mantras can help change our mindsets about ourselves and the situations we find ourselves in. For example, if you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed, try saying “I am calm and in control of this situation” or “This too shall pass.” Be sure to say these mantras out loud so that they become more effective.
5 Honour your boundaries
You’re allowed to draw your own personal lines and stick to them. You don’t owe people explanations or the chance to negotiate.
Perhaps you feel like you need to explain yourself, but you don’t. You don’t need to tell people why you can’t see them or why you won’t respond to their texts. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for anything — especially not for how you feel about them or how much time you want to spend with them.
If someone asks why say something like “I just can’t right now” or “I have other things going on right now that are more important to me. I wish I could take more time with you, but this is all I have right now.” If they push further, then it might be time to cut ties completely.
6 Meditate
Meditation is a powerful tool for mental health. Research suggests that spending more time meditating could improve your mental health in the long term.
One way to begin: Find a comfortable and quiet place to sit for 10 minutes. Close your eyes and focus your attention on your breath, heartbeat, and the positive goals you have for the day.
If you’re having trouble staying focused on one thing, try counting each breath from one to five. When thoughts enter your mind, acknowledge them and then return your focus to your breath or heart rate. If you get distracted by something completely unrelated — like an itch or phone vibration — stop what you’re doing and bring your attention back to your breath or heart rate again until it’s clear of distractions.
7 Put your phone on aeroplane mode
Many people report feeling less anxious when they take purposeful breaks from social media or their phones. Consider putting your phone on aeroplane mode or in another room while you’re working or spending time with people so that it doesn’t distract you.
If you want to be more connected to your friends and family, but don’t want the anxiety that comes with constant connection, consider using an app like Moment, which helps limit your time on social media.
8 Get rid of things that aren’t serving you
It’s a good idea to keep things that make you happy and bring you joy, but it’s also important to get rid of the things that don’t. If you have items around your house that are just taking up space or weighing you down emotionally, it’s time to declutter and let them go.
If it’s been a while since your last purge and you’re feeling like it’s time again, take some time to inventory what you have and decide what should stay and what should go. Here are some tips:
Consider your emotional attachment to each item. Are there any items that hold memories? Is there an item that reminds you of an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend? If so, is that something that would benefit from being stored somewhere else?
Ask yourself if you really need these things in your life right now or if they’re just taking up space. If it’s something small like a canvas bag or tiered stand for the kitchen countertop, consider donating it instead of throwing it away (you never know who might need it). If it’s something larger like a piece of furniture or clothing item, take photos of it before tossing it so you’ll always have the memory.
9 Choose foods that nourish you from the inside out
Nutrition is often considered a boring topic, but it shouldn’t be. Food is the fuel that keeps us going, and it can make us feel better or worse depending on what we eat.
Just as you want your external space to make you happy and feel nice to you, be good to your body with your food choices. Everyone’s dietary preferences and needs are different, but in general aim for a range of mostly unprocessed fruits, vegetables, grains, and proteins, as well as the occasional necessary indulgence.
As a side note, if you are an extremely busy person, a meal service like Hello Fresh or Green Chef (not sponsored) might be a good option. It makes menu planning so much easier and you’ll be able to quickly prepare a healthy meal for your family.
10 Make the small moments special
Celebrations are worth celebrating, even if they’re small.
It’s easy to get into the habit of making big celebrations and forgetting about the small ones. But when you celebrate the little things, you can make your life feel more connected and meaningful.
Small moments of celebration throughout your day can also help you remember to be grateful for what you have. So instead of always waiting until Sunday night to thank God for all his blessings, try thanking him during a quiet morning walk or a moment with your kids.
Can you add in more micro-celebrations throughout your day? Could you play music while you’re in the shower to set the tone for the rest of your morning? What about lighting a candle you love while you’re working? The small moments of your day are what add up to be your life, so don’t feel like they aren’t worth celebrating.
11 Practice gratitude
Gratitude is one of the most powerful emotions you can experience. It’s known to increase happiness, improve physical health and strengthen relationships.
It’s also a skill that anyone can learn and practice. Here are some tips on how you can become a more grateful person:
Write gratitude notes. Start with one person you’re grateful for, then write them a note saying why. You could also do this with your partner or children, or even your family pet!
Exchange voice memos with a friend detailing what you’re grateful for. A nice way to connect with someone and share something positive about yourself at the same time!
Do a nightly list in your journal. At the end of each day, write down what went well that day and why you were grateful for it. This will help reinforce your sense of appreciation for the good things in life.
12 Try something new
Trying new things can be exciting and fun — but it’s also a great way to find out more about yourself.
Whether it’s a new class, a fun recipe, or an alternate route to go to the store, try something different. Even if you don’t like it, you’ll likely learn something new and feel more connected to yourself.
If you feel like you’re stuck in a rut and need some inspiration, here are five ways that trying something new can benefit your mental health:
It can help with creativity. When we’re comfortable with our lives, we become less creative — there are fewer opportunities for us to think outside of the box or come up with new ideas. By trying something new, we open ourselves up to new possibilities that might never have occurred otherwise. It could even lead to discovering your passion!
13 Move your body
Research has found countless benefits (both mental and physical) to daily exercise. It’s not necessary to push yourself too hard, and more isn’t always better. Exercise doesn’t have to be perfect. It’s about moving your body and doing something for yourself. If it’s hard for you to get started or if your goal seems unrealistic, don’t worry about it — just accept where you’re at today and move forward with that understanding.
If you’re not sure how to start or what type of exercise would be best for you, try a 30-minute walk. It’s common to feel that the motivation to exercise just isn’t there, even if you initially wanted to. If you’d like to make exercise a habit but feel like a lack of motivation is getting in your way, here’s some info that could help.
14 Ask for help and allow yourself to receive it
When you’re feeling overwhelmed, it can be difficult to ask for help. The natural inclination is to try to do everything yourself. You might think that asking for help makes you less capable or less worthy of love and attention.
But the truth is, lots of us have a hard time accepting even a compliment, let alone offers for help. Even if we need it, we may shun outside assistance. However, it’s human to have needs and to lean on the community in order to meet those needs. Try to allow yourself to be vulnerable and accept help from others.
15 Make a vision board
Vision boards are great for helping you visualize what you want to achieve. They can be anything from small 3×5 cards to large pieces of poster board, but the idea is the same. You create a collage of images that represent your goals and dreams, and then hang it somewhere where you will see it every day.
Creating a vision board and displaying it somewhere you’ll see it often can help boost your mood and remind you of what you want to attract and accomplish in your life. A lot of people make these when the new year starts, but there’s never a wrong time to create one.
To get started with creating your own vision board, all you really need is some simple supplies. You can use anything from magazine cutouts to pictures printed off the internet or photos were taken with your phone camera. The possibilities are endless!
16 Spend time in nature
Spending time outside is great for your physical and mental health. You can couple being outside with a hobby like photography, but you can also just sit or stroll in the great outdoors and still reap the benefits.
Here are some of the benefits of spending time in nature:
- You’ll sleep better.
- Your mood will improve.
- Your blood pressure will drop.
- You’ll be less stressed (and more creative).
- You’ll boost your immune system by exposing yourself to more vitamin D (which you can get from sunlight) and reducing inflammation caused by harmful bacteria (which you can avoid by not touching dirty surfaces).
17 Give yourself permission to say ‘no’
You can’t be everything to everyone, and it’s hard to give anything your best if you’re constantly trying to do it all. When you practice saying “no,” it allows you to take on what you can handle. This is a great way to respect and love yourself more.
If you’re not in the habit of telling people “no,” it can feel challenging and even anxiety-inducing. Here are some tips for getting started:
Set boundaries around what you can and cannot do. When someone asks you for a favour or asks for your time, take a moment before responding. In an internal dialogue with yourself, write down what your priorities are and how much time (or money) is involved in this request. If it fits into your schedule, that’s great! If not, tell them so — but do so kindly. Remember that there are no bad feelings when it comes to saying no; only feelings of relief when we don’t overcommit ourselves.
18 Remind yourself of your worth
Self-talk is the internal dialogue we have with ourselves. It can be positive or negative, it can be helpful or hurtful, and it can be constructive or destructive.
We’ve all caught ourselves in negative self-talk from time to time, but what if you made a concerted effort to lift yourself up? If you need reminders to do so, you can leave notes around the house that point out what you love best about yourself.
Here are 5 tips to improve your self-talk if you’d like a deeper dive:
- Identify your negative self-talk
- Find positive alternatives for each negative thought
- Practice these replacement thoughts until they become automatic responses
- Add new positive thoughts every day (or week) as needed
- Recognize progress by rewarding yourself
19 Schedule time for your hobby
It’s easy to get caught up in the busyness of life, and before you know it, your day is full of work, errands and commitments. It’s important to carve out time for yourself — even if it’s just 20 minutes to unwind at the end of the day.
Schedule time for your hobby. Writing, painting, taking photos — whatever your hobbies are, consider setting aside a block of time just for them. Loving yourself is doing those things that make your heart smile.
20 Cast out the idea that you have to be perfect
If you’re wondering how to practice self-love, start by ditching the idea of perfect. Perfect in every way—body, life, IQ. The idea of perfection is false, and when you see it on social media, it frequently hides serious mental health problems.
Never expect to be flawless. It’s good to know that nobody is. Nobody aspires to an idealized standard of perfection; everyone has distinctive qualities and personalities.
Perfectionism is a dangerous addiction. It causes you to focus on what’s wrong with yourself instead of accepting who you are right now. This can lead to low self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness—and even worse, if you try and fail at something (like weight loss), it will make you feel worthless.
The above are just some ways that you can practice self-care and self-love, but there are many more. Whatever your interests are, take the time to explore them and appreciate the ways in which they help you relax, recharge, and make you feel better about yourself and your life. Remember, it’s important to show yourself love and self-care in order for you to be the best person that you can be for the people around you.